What is it about casual sex or hooking up that offends the righteous masses?
People describe casual sex, hooking up or ‘friends with benefits’ as something sinister or malevolent.
It’s frowned upon.
No strings sex has gotten a bad rep.
It’s all so easy to judge fun between consenting adults as if they owe something to your moral high horse, but I’d like to touch on a few things that really piss me off.
Disclaimer: I hook up. I enjoy casual sex. Sue me.
Hookup sex is said to have ‘no meaning or emotions’.
Okay, I guess this is a double-edged sword.
If you’re sleeping around and can’t keep track of names or faces, then sure, the sex probably has no emotion or feeling.
But if you have sex with a good friend or someone you enjoy being with then it’s perfectly plausible that there can be emotion or feeling between the sheets — which in my opinion makes sex better.
And it does not mean the two of you are an exclusive item. It just means two people really enjoy each other’s company. And there is nothing wrong with that.
Or is there?
Apparently there is!
Some people believe casual sex is degrading to women.
Well, I do it all the time. And I don’t see anything degrading about it.
I even find guys like my openness about sex.
Why is casual sex degrading to women?
It’s not like we’re not enjoying ourselves.
But go ahead, let society tell us we’re sluts and whores. Or that there’s some childhood trauma clouding our judgment…
What the hell does it matter to you?
Sex is only degrading to those who come away feeling degraded. Everything else is pure social stigma, or whispers and rumours.
It’s amazing how some people can find the moral high ground to feel offended by somebody else’s preferences between the sheets.
I repeat: amazing.
Another accusation is, unfortunately, merited in some cases:
Casual sex spreads disease.
And yet casual sex does not cause the disease.
People fail to see the lines between correlation and causation. You can have casual sex a million times and come away with a clean bill of health. It’s when you start neglecting sexual responsibility aka ‘Safe Sex’ that the problems kick in.
Guys: If you’re going to do the deed, then you should wrap it up.
Ladies: If you’re going to do the deed, then you should make damn sure he wraps it up.
It’s not just the prevention of diseases that safe sex can aid. It’s population control.
People like to complain about people having casual sex and making babies.
Well, condoms are extremely effective if used properly in tandem with a second form of birth control.
You can hate the players, but you can’t hate the game.
Casual sex does not cause pregnancy any more so than sex in a loving relationship. Mistakes can be made for a married couple, or a fleeting couple in the night.
Responsibility is the key factor here.
And that is perhaps why ‘casual’ sex is poorly named.
Anybody who works in the porn industry — a gigantic web of casual, uncommitted sex — will be able to attest that it is anything but ‘casual’ when it comes to sexual health.
I guess what I’m trying to say is this:
If somebody is having casual sex, it’s none of your business to judge them (unless it’s with your loved one, in which case you should be judging their character!).
If somebody has casual sex and gets infected with various sexual diseases, has multiple babies, and still doesn’t learn their lesson… even then, you shouldn’t judge them.
You should just avoid having sex with them.